Sunday, 18 August 2013

Breaking the habit

I have never done this in the past but this beautiful Ghazal demands of me that I spread it to whoever might want to listen to it and help translate it.

This is the media file



And here is an absolutely beautiful, apt and perfect translation of this poetry which preserves its essence as it was meant by the original poet

http://amitdas.me/2007/04/13/gul-hui-jaati-hai-faiz

Monday, 8 July 2013

Phoenix

He was burnt. His ashes scattered across the multitude of this time space continuum, across the infinity of this multiverse. His essence sliced and diced and shredded and finally spread ever so thin ever so precisely that he lost his sense of being.

Aloof he spun. Across countless ages, across countless eons. He floated with the cosmic dust, got burnt by shooting comets, was consumed by gaping black holes, vaporized by exploding supernovas until finally he was lost somewhere within the fading memories of time.

He entered his purgatory.

Then he heard it. Something somewhere deep within what was once him. A call. A faint yet distinguished cry. His name. Something somewhere in one of his countless distributed ephemeral specks of dust stirred. It called out to him.

And the multiverse laughed. A deep guttural throaty laugh. A laugh laced with pity and drunk with its own supremacy. It echoed from the gaping, yawning icy depths of the the Malebolge where the dark forces stirred too. Ever so keen to indulge in the carnal pleasures of feasting on a soul lest that soul should find its path again - they laughed, they danced, they sharpened their hooves and their claws and their fangs. They lit their fires, the waiting pyres yet again. Overjoyed. Waiting.

The speck spoke again. It said one word – No.

No.

Not again. Not this time. No.

The narrative was faint, weak. Merely beyond a whisper, barely an audible. Yet that No reverberated. It resonated. It permeated the ether of this cosmic energy and it entered the hum of creation. It disturbed the patterns of destruction. It found matter and anti-matter and dark energy and forced them all together within the confines of a singularity. It was merciless, unstoppable and like a star collapsing under its own weight it tugged at every bit of me all across the infinity.

Carnal. Visceral. Nigh feral. Of the tug at the strings.

Slowly but firmly his ashes came together. Bound together and drawn mercilessly by the resounding echo of this one oh so negative a word they flew as one towards the speck which spoke. The worshippers of Lucifer oh how they shied away. They cowered, they hushed. They sliced themselves open and drenched the lit pyres with their satanic, demonic blood lest they draw the wrath of this one speck, this ever growing entity that is now submitting everything in its path to resonate with its own rhythm.

He was forming again. Bound in part by his name and in part by the single No he was coming together again. Slowly, gradually the ashes took his shape. Still fragile, still ephemeral, yet the blood started to make his ashes stick together.

And then it peaked. The disturbance, the resonance, the hum of this energy. It reached its crescendo.
With the force of countless stars it exploded annihilating the entirety that it touched. It fused matter and energy into one amorphous creation which it then pushed into his faltering silhouette.

He drank. He soaked. He gaped and gulped and consumed this combined medley that was pushed into him. 

He let it flow through him. The pain was searing; burning. Rivers of red hot scorching lava flew through him fusing his name together into a concrete shape.

He was reborn. The last remnants of the molten red pools glowing softly in his eyes He stood in the deafening silence of destruction.

He was complete. Fists clenched, head bowed, eyes shedding blood, and taught sinews and rippling muscles glistening with sweat - He was ready.

Phoenix.



Monday, 29 April 2013

Memories

Roll me a weed, light me a candle, strum me a guitar, coo me a Floyd and let my world go to cinders all around me.

Monday, 23 March 2009

Where am I!

Hey People!

Apologies about my absence but I have been very busy recently with lots of things happening here in my life. For starters I got myself a new job, had to buy another car and am also moving house!

I promise to be back very soon!

Keep checking!


Tuesday, 11 November 2008

A Perfect Evening


An evening perched precariously on the edge of sanity swaying intoxicatingly between the realms of soberness and freedom, a cube of ice melting its essence in the warm embrace of single malt scotch, a laptop cooing songs that drape a veil on vision, a tear dancing on the verge of lips crooked with sarcastic smile whispering their silent prayers to the heavens above and their darkest desires to the Satan below , some random images of a past life fluttering all around as beautiful butterflies enlightened with the joys felt and a half sober mind helplessly and hopelessly striving to catch them and put them together to make a coherent picture, few broken fingers trying to capture this mixed torrent of thoughts, experiences, memories and emotions while they dance their broken dance on this keypad and caught between these interdependent elements of my existence my dwindling self........

A perfect evening

Wednesday, 22 October 2008

Awesome!

This is so awesome!

This is one of the videos in a campaign by the UK government to promote road safety in the UK. Please see the video and leave us a comment telling us if you did it or not!


Enjoy!

Wednesday, 6 August 2008

Yesterday


Time
Don't let it slip away
Raise yo' drinkin' glass
Here's to yesterday
In Time
We're all gonna trip away
Don't piss Heaven off
We got Hell to pay
Come full circle
(Song "Full Circle". Band "Aerosmith")


Times change a man.

Yes they do.


From over the top of his three work monitors he gazes vacantly up at the flat screen monitor on the wall right in front of him running endless CNBC Europe with all manners and shapes of charts, bar graphs with numbers scrolling up and down and left and right all endlessly hammering his mind with incessant information. He stares at the screen watching all "Breaking News" headlines as they jump around pretty faces of business women with a "I mean business don’t fuck with me" written all over their forehead and middle aged pot bellied men offering endless opinions on stock prices, company actuals, EPS numbers, EPSREP numbers, EBG numbers...XYZ numbers.


He simply stares.


He averts his gaze which inadvertently falls on his three work monitors. These smart handsome boys scream another tale of the same world that he now lives in. Emails from Reuters, Bloomberg, traders, stock analysts, Quants, techies, stock prices not coming in, numbers bungled, sedols wrong, issuers fucked up...oh damn!


He was a Delhi boy through and through. The kinds that roam endlessly, freely over NOIDA toll bridge at 2 in the night with a plastic bucket full of melting big ice slabs and 12 bottles of Fosters chilling in them. The mission - to ravage these 12 bottles during the journey from west Delhi toll bridge to Gurgaon where more booze awaits. The kinds that would dance bhangra and break dance routines all mangled into one limb jerking madness of an orgy which would take place over cheap cello taped dance floors used commonly in weddings, throwing his stole up in the air as he yells on the top of his voice the lyrics of any song he could remember. Never mind if the so called DJ was playing a different number altogether. The kinds who would catch every movie featuring Bipasha the day it was released and towards the end get insanely jealous of John, and then work out in the gym diligently after every Bips movie only to give it up after a month till the next Bips movie kicks the entire cycle again.


The kind for whom every girl was a pursuit, a challenge, a conquest he had to have and had to win, the kinds that would be brilliant, geniuses at college, at school but would always be hunting for books one night before the exam and be miserably drunk on the evening of the last one. The kinds who would be always missing from classes, intimidating, cajoling some geek in the college for his/her notes and who would always run up the most massive bill at the college photo copier before their exams and would promptly forget about the bill as soon as the exams were over.


The kind who would always be least bothered of whatever he is wearing, the kind who would lazily drag himself to the afternoon class in torn chappals and jeans having just woken up from a bad hangover of the night before, only to realize he hates the guts of this prof and would promptly turn back on his heels to head back to hostel again where in a room without any kind of air cooling system with a lone fan that wont work because there would be no electricity his royal wooden bed without any mattress would await him on which he would sleep the most glorious relaxing sleep in the hot Delhi July afternoon.


Yes he was a Delhi boy through and through.


Now he wears a suit every morning. His shirts are all designers with cuff links, his trousers all pressed crisp. His shoes shine; he wears horn rimmed designer glasses and lives in a world of numbers. Working in the heart of old money's financial capital, the city of London, for a reputed big hedge fund he gets up at 6 every morning and is at work by 8. He doesn’t shout, doesn’t scream with delight anymore, and doesn’t delve into the limb jerking madness while he is on a brilliantly finished posh dance floor in one of his organization's events dancing with pretty ladies around him. He doesn’t drive wild in the nights doesn’t go roaming over motorways with chilled beer in the back of his car and definitely is not up till 4 am. He sleeps on comfortable beds in temperature controlled room and yet has difficulty falling to sleep. He hates but takes sleeping pills.


His “friends” are all PhDs, learned fellows who can simulate trading patterns in their heads and rattle off the earning numbers for FTSE 100 companies while they nibble over their chicken skewers and sip their droughts. No more the neighborhood guys from the street who barely cleared 10+2 but for whom life meant this moment, this very moment that they breath in, nothing beyond this moment mattered, the moment that just passed never existed and the next moment would never come. Those who lived their lives right now, right here even if they are slumped on the floor of a hostel room piled on by 5 guys each side, all passed out after a session of good old hostel party and didn’t have a scooby about what class is at 9 tomorrow morning.


Gone are the roadside dhabas with 4 am Aloo ke Paronthe and their ultimate adrak waali chai coupled with a Fan that he used to relish dunking in. Now it’s Lavazza black Americano with a tad of cold skimmed milk on the side please and an occasional donut from Krispy Kreme or maybe just a fruit and nut bar hmmm?


Gone are the days of Royal Challenge when Blender’s Pride used to be a gourmet treat. Now it’s all Scapa and Jameson and Jack Daniels with occasional Remy Martins and Hennessey for our boy. No more drinking straight shots from plastic Pepsi glasses while stuffed into a dark hot and cramped room at the back of a small local cyber cafe hiding from parents, neighbors, other friends who didn’t share the cost of the whiskey or Kurkure. Now he sniffs his wine while slumped in comfortable leather bean bags, swooshes his crystal glass and gurgles it in his mouth before he spits it out for sommelier pretending to make up some cock and bull story about the flavor while frankly he couldnt give shit about the wine's "particularly woody tinge".

The boy has come a long way. A long long way rather. He acquired all that he wanted to and is on the path that would lead him to more of his desires. Things that he always wanted to achieve ever since he was a teenager living in a single room with his parents and siblings. Luxuries he could only dream of, life he could only imagine living. Now he has it all and soon would have all that is remaining.


Why then is he sitting on his desk, middle of a business day, staring at his monitors and asking himself – I achieved all I wanted to, want to, but is this really worth what I gave up?


Time
Don't let it slip away
Raise yo' drinkin' glass
Here's to yesterday
In Time
We're all gonna trip away
Don't piss Heaven off
We got Hell to pay
Come full circle